My Father's Eyes

As I walked around Lake Banook this morning with Max, I was thinking about my Dad and the conversation I had with him in the spring of 2000. I was in Regina working on the Swan River (Manitoba) natural gas project for my company. My job was to confirm customer interest in the natural gas project. I was lucky because I could drop by and say hi to Dad when I was travelling back and forth to Swan River.

Dad was 74 at the time and he knew he was at the end of his stay on earth. He was terrified of dying and I could see it in his eyes.

During one of my trips to Swan River, I decided to stop by the farm and say hi and give Dad a hug.

Sidebar: Hugging was not part of Dad's world. When I first started giving him a hug when I sobered up, it was like hugging a 2X4 board, however, as the years progressed he started to look forward to my hugs. In the last years of his life, he would even hug me in public!

Back to my story. I stopped by and stayed for a few minutes, having coffee with Dad. Mom was off to town and Dad was all by himself in the farm house. When I looked into his eyes, I could see he was absolutely lonely and frightened. We chatted a while and I said I had to go. We hugged and off I went. About a half a mile down the road, I knew I had to turn around and ask him a question. I always wanted to ask Dad to do me a favor when he died.

I turned the car around and went back to see Dad. He was outside on his way to check on the new born calfs and their moms. He was surprise to see me back. I got out of the car and asked him "Dad I have been meaning to ask you this question. Can you do me a favor when you die?". "Sure Harve". "Dad, when it's your turn, and if you can, can you come back and touch me somehow?" He nodded as I was looking into his eyes. He changed before me; he had a purpose for dieing. The fear was gone, at least in that moment. I am so glad I turned the car around and asked him that difficult question!

Dad died on April 06, 2003. Tomorrow, the rest of the story.

Gido