A New Journey Begins ...

I am hoping this will be a long list of blogs as I document the progress of new journey and challenge. I plan to be honest, open and willing to receive new information. Please say hi once in a while!

It was a week ago today that I heard those terrifying words --- "You have Cancer". It seems the rest of the conversation that I had with the Dr. B was muted. I heard "blah, blah, blah" for the remainder of the conversation, however, I did here something else --- "Your Gleason Score was 9 out of 10. That means it's an aggressive type of cancer."

I received the life changing phone call at home after walking my dog Max. I was in shock and thought I was going to die the next day. I was scared (and still am). I had to wait for a hour and one-half for my "angel" to come home and I knew the conversation would be painful and full of tears. I called my son and told him to come over to help out. I am glad he is close by!. I told her and we all cried a little bit. I then called my daughter W and told her. That was the most painful because I knew W was going to be scared for me. "Dad, I love you" were her comforting words. "I know sweetie, I love you too". Dads really seem to love their daughters a lot ... I know I love mine a lot. A and I didn't sleep at all that night ... it was the longest of nights.

So I have prostate cancer? I think I will call it the "Monster" from now one and I will consider the next few weeks and months (and hopefully years) the next stage of my life and new journey. I also hope my ramblings will assist others and if not, that is OK because I will have a forum to communicate and document my emotions, thoughts and actions.

Last Friday, A and I went to the Dr. B's office to talk about the findings and prognosis. All is not lost, but he did indicate it was going to be busy the next few weeks. I have to study as much as I could and ask lots of questions. The best way to get healthy is to get involved in the solution. Very much like my recovery from alcoholism. Thank God, I am an alcoholic! When I sobered up in 1990, I didn't think that would be a phase I would publish some where, but it sure is a true statement. I have some great friends in my 12 Step Program, in my work life and personal life. If is a wonderful feeling to know others are praying to the God as they understand their God to be.

I think I will stop here. I have a tendency to live in extremes ... "go far or go broke". I will be slowing down and trying to live in the minute and live "One Day at a Time". Besides, I have to be at the hospital for a bone scan in a few minutes. Bye for now.